Oops

[ladysprite]

Sorry, I didn't mean to vanish like that, however briefly. I've been so busy just surviving minute to minute and day to day that I haven't had anything left over to write about it. I know that sounds melodramatic, but it's true. Or at least, it's how I feel.

One of the hardest parts about all of this is the nagging feeling, deep down inside, that I'm being a baby and that I should be able to just shrug my shoulders, take a deep breath, and get over it. I cried for half an hour the other day when I found out that (for the second time this year) the landscapers decided to weed my garden for me with a weed-whacker. Thr first time, they only destroyed the soybeans. This time they shredded half our green been patch, chopped all the leaves off the eggplant and half the vines off the cucumbers, and decimated the outer row of tomatoes. Yeah, it's frustrating, but it's not worth hysterics. Grow up, take a deep breath, move on.

I did make it to my doctor, at least, amid rather deep fears that he would tell me that it was just a stiff neck and that I should grow up, stop being such a whiner, and learn to live with it. Instead, I have scary muscle relaxants and a warning that I may need physical therapy. With any luck I'll start feeling better soon, and then I'll magically regain my ability to cope.

Right now, what I want more than anything is to climb into bed, pull the blankets up to my ears, not hear anything unpleasant, and sleep for about three days straight.

Oh, well.

Comments

[sdorn.livejournal.com]

One of the hardest parts about all of this is the nagging feeling, deep down inside, that I'm being a baby and that I should be able to just shrug my shoulders, take a deep breath, and get over it.

Almost. You should be able to shrug your sheoulders, take a deep breath, cope with stress using Method X (see below), and then get over it.

Method X: a choice of as many of the following as are needed:

• Physical therapy session of 8 hours holding a friendly cat
  
• Backrub from your fiancé
  
• Dancing with wild abandon
  
• A good cry in a comfortably private place
  
• A secret plan to take over the world
  
• A game of darts
  
• A pint of really good beer
  
• Add your own here

[braider.livejournal.com]

Um, no, you shouldn't just "get on with it", you should call the landscapers and complain vociferously. I've been somewhat startled in the last couple years that the few times I lost it and yelled at someone for something they really had done wrong, it produced pleasing results.

[matildalucet.livejournal.com]

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<Very gentle, non-pain-inducing hugs>

The "sleep three days straight" feeling sounds like me during the crash-and-burn stage of depression. If it doesn't go away, you might ask the doctor about that. I didn't want to talk to my doctor about it, but promised Steve I would, and then burst into tears in the office, trying to talk about my feelings. And I am NOT a weak person. I don't believe you are either. Oh, and I got better, though it took a little time.

<More hugs, because I don't know anything better to do>

[jtdiii.livejournal.com]

Landscapers can be screamed at. They can even be fired.

Deer on the other hand are forever... I have several deer that have decided that my squash plants are very tasty, and they like to stand around the garden delicately eating the leaves off of them. Then when they need a change of taste they start on the basil and peas. They are completely avoiding my tomato jungle.

I would consider flouting a few state hunting laws, except for the fact that there is a neighbor's house in line with the garden and the direction I would be shooting. Maybe paintballs... :)

[cyan-blue.livejournal.com]

Hugs, hon... it's ok to feel down when frustrating things happen!

How green was my garden

[cristovau.livejournal.com]

Sorry to hear about the garden. I understand the desire to do the confrontation avoidance thing, but a complaint should be made before you lose more plants. It isn't childish to feel hurt about this, but it is a loss if you let this freeze you.

Maybe you need a scarecrow like object to keep the landscapers away. I'd suggest a Martha Stewart doll.

[jducoeur]

One of the hardest parts about all of this is the nagging feeling, deep down inside, that I'm being a baby and that I should be able to just shrug my shoulders, take a deep breath, and get over it.

Hmm. Y'know, all of this sounds rather eerily like the one bout of genuine Depression I've had, a year or two ago -- right down to the feeling that I didn't deserve to be so unhappy, and the desire to just climb into bed for days.

Take care of yourself, keep an eye on yourself, and don't go feeling guilty about your feelings...

[siderea]

1) What jducoeur said.

2) Why is it not worth hysterics when someone mutilates your garden? I don't get it. If it were me, someone would get their month ruined besides me. I would go on the fucking warpath, filled with righteous screaming fury. I would make some poor bastard -- ideally the one responsible -- wish that he had never been born, and that I would just kill him to put him out of his misery.

And I would not feel the least bit guilty about it at all.

[vettecat.livejournal.com]

Can you put up some wire or something around your vegetable patch, so they can't decimate it?

Glad you have some medicine for your neck, hope it helps...