First, a belated happy birthday to you - the world has been made brighter by your birth, and I'm very happy that you are my friend.
I've been thinking of these things myself, trying to think about who and what I want to be.
One of the biggest things for me was a realization that I can make those choices from a place of power.
For example, there was a time when, if someone told me that my manner of speaking wasn't as effective as it could be, I'd be upset about it; people should pay attention to what I say, not how I say it!
But I realized, on my own, that I wanted to learn vocal techniques - that I wanted to be able to speak calmly, more slowly, a bit more deeply, and with greater seeming-authority. So I did, because that's how I want to be.
It was a *huge* difference in my outlook. It touched with that other thing I mentioned - remember how I said, I sometimes imagine someone's writing a book, and I look for the stuff that makes me smile and think the author just *perfectly* captured the character of John Palmer, that it was perfectly in line with what I feel I know about that character? That kind of thing. I'm trying to think more about that, and that really helps me make decisions about myself.
Because in many cases, there are no wrong decisions - a person might be the kind of person who ends up hanging out on college campuses with teenagers, because that's who they are. The danger is turning into, as you say, the person who hangs out on college campuses with teenagers who should have moved on - but didn't.
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I've been thinking of these things myself, trying to think about who and what I want to be.
One of the biggest things for me was a realization that I can make those choices from a place of power.
For example, there was a time when, if someone told me that my manner of speaking wasn't as effective as it could be, I'd be upset about it; people should pay attention to what I say, not how I say it!
But I realized, on my own, that I wanted to learn vocal techniques - that I wanted to be able to speak calmly, more slowly, a bit more deeply, and with greater seeming-authority. So I did, because that's how I want to be.
It was a *huge* difference in my outlook. It touched with that other thing I mentioned - remember how I said, I sometimes imagine someone's writing a book, and I look for the stuff that makes me smile and think the author just *perfectly* captured the character of John Palmer, that it was perfectly in line with what I feel I know about that character? That kind of thing. I'm trying to think more about that, and that really helps me make decisions about myself.
Because in many cases, there are no wrong decisions - a person might be the kind of person who ends up hanging out on college campuses with teenagers, because that's who they are. The danger is turning into, as you say, the person who hangs out on college campuses with teenagers who should have moved on - but didn't.