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The Tragedy of Responsibility
Mar. 8th, 2013 07:43 amSometimes being a grownup and taking responsibility for my own health and well-being is No Fun At All.
I've been dealing with a shoulder/spine injury since around September. (Honestly, probably since somewhere around 2003, but that's when it got bad enough that I wound up in the ER.) Physical therapy, acupuncture, massage, and meds finally got it back to almost-normal by mid to late January. I was managing, and starting to actually be active again.
Then, around two weeks ago, it flared up again. But I tried to take it easy, and take care of it. Until Monday, when a well-meaning but enthusiastic Labrador Retriever yanked the hell out of my arm, landing me right back in the land of Right Back Where This All Started.
And I have to make that uphill trudge again. And I'd like it not to take four months. Which means *actually* resting and not using my right arm, instead of forgetting or feeling lazy and carrying my own laundry, muscling through tango class, and scrubbing the bathtub to prove that I can. I have a sling, mostly to remind me that I'm INJURED DAMNIT and keep me from being active.
The problem? This weekend is the big local SCA dance event. And Ren dance isn't *too* heavy on the arms/neck; I really want to go. And I can argue that it shouldn't be too bad for me. And it probably won't make things too much worse. And shouldn't, and probably, and justifications and excuses and honestly, if I really want to get better fast, I should stay the heck home and rest.
Damnit.
Also, in the land of mixed blessings? The good thing about being substance-free is that, on the rare occasions that I do take heavy-duty meds, they work like a charm. The bad thing is that so do ALL of their side effects. If I never take ultram again it'll be too soon; there's an intersection of 'may cause drowsiness' and 'may cause GI upset' that deserves its own circle in Hell....
I've been dealing with a shoulder/spine injury since around September. (Honestly, probably since somewhere around 2003, but that's when it got bad enough that I wound up in the ER.) Physical therapy, acupuncture, massage, and meds finally got it back to almost-normal by mid to late January. I was managing, and starting to actually be active again.
Then, around two weeks ago, it flared up again. But I tried to take it easy, and take care of it. Until Monday, when a well-meaning but enthusiastic Labrador Retriever yanked the hell out of my arm, landing me right back in the land of Right Back Where This All Started.
And I have to make that uphill trudge again. And I'd like it not to take four months. Which means *actually* resting and not using my right arm, instead of forgetting or feeling lazy and carrying my own laundry, muscling through tango class, and scrubbing the bathtub to prove that I can. I have a sling, mostly to remind me that I'm INJURED DAMNIT and keep me from being active.
The problem? This weekend is the big local SCA dance event. And Ren dance isn't *too* heavy on the arms/neck; I really want to go. And I can argue that it shouldn't be too bad for me. And it probably won't make things too much worse. And shouldn't, and probably, and justifications and excuses and honestly, if I really want to get better fast, I should stay the heck home and rest.
Damnit.
Also, in the land of mixed blessings? The good thing about being substance-free is that, on the rare occasions that I do take heavy-duty meds, they work like a charm. The bad thing is that so do ALL of their side effects. If I never take ultram again it'll be too soon; there's an intersection of 'may cause drowsiness' and 'may cause GI upset' that deserves its own circle in Hell....
