Conversations With Myself....

On The Momentous Occasion Of Attempting to Clean Out My Dresser In Preparation For Packing And Moving:

Me: Okay, self. We're going through our entire wardrobe, and we're going to get rid of everything you don't actually wear.
Myself: Okey dokey.
Me: Really. I mean it - if it hasn't seen active use within the past year, it's going to Goodwill.
Myself: Yep. Sure thing.
Me: Like this blouse. I don't think you've *ever* actually worn it.
Myself: Not that one! It's such a pretty shade of blue!
Me: It's a size 14.
Myself: But... I could, like, wear it loose over a tank top! Kinda tie the ends, very casual but cool.... no?
Me: Have you ever actually done that?
Myself: .....um.....
Me: Right. Into the Goodwill bag. And the same with the other fifteen silk blouses here.
Myself: But they were presents from my mother-in-law!
Me: They were hand-me-downs. You're continuing a tradition.
Myself: You're mean.
Me: Stuff it. And this t-shirt needs to go, too.
Myself: Not my Catwoman t-shirt! NO!
Me: You haven't worn it since 1996.
Myself: It was a present from my best friend!
Me: You haven't seen *her* since even earlier.
Myself: Exactly! This t-shirt is all I have of her! If I throw it away, it'll be like KILLING her!
Me: That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. In the bag. Now.
Myself: MY SHIRT RAAAAR!
Me: *sigh* Okay, fine. But that means we have to get rid of something else, instead. How about the electric purple oversized Tinkerbell t-shirt you got for Christmas three years ago and never wore?
Myself: *sniffle* my shirt....
Me: This is going to be a very, very long process, isn't it?