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Hanging In There
Nov. 23rd, 2008 06:02 pmYou guys are pretty damn good with your prayers and thoughts and wishes and candles. It's only been two days, and I'm starting to be able to use my leg again.
After spending all of yesterday imitating an inanimate object, I'm actually feeling a little bit better today. I still can't straighten my leg all the way, but I didn't wake myself up screaming when I rolled over in my sleep last night, and I can get around the house with a cane or hobbling from prop to prop, instead of needing crutches to go from the sofa to the kitchen. I am hoping as hard as I can that this means that I'm dealing with a more transitory problem than a torn meniscus - if there's any way I can get out of this situation without surgery, I'll be unendingly grateful - and that going back to work tomorrow won't undo all the good that this sedentary weekend has done.
I've managed to avoid falling into a completely horrible mood, also, thanks to the presence of good friends, Top Chef marathons, an impressive stack of crafting projects, and the new issue of 'Fine Cooking: Cookies' - it's not *quite* too early to start planning this season's holiday baking. I'm bored and achy, but neither homicidal nor suicidal. And that's something, I guess.
I had it brought home to me today, by a friend who called to find out why I had apparently vanished off the face of the earth a month ago, just how much crap I've been through lately. Car accidents, serious work problems, overbooking, performance (fun, but still stressy), financial woes, travel, injury, pushing my own emotional boundaries... and I'm tired, and frustrated, but I'm still here.
I know I've been less than present lately, and I've probably been less than pleasant, as well. At the same time, though, I'm a tiny bit proud of myself for not falling apart utterly. So - apologies and gratitude beyond belief to all of y'all that I've been leaning on, and a plea for just a little more patience. With any luck the universe will get tired of kicking me around sometime soon, and I can eventually spring back to being a little ray of sunshine again.....
After spending all of yesterday imitating an inanimate object, I'm actually feeling a little bit better today. I still can't straighten my leg all the way, but I didn't wake myself up screaming when I rolled over in my sleep last night, and I can get around the house with a cane or hobbling from prop to prop, instead of needing crutches to go from the sofa to the kitchen. I am hoping as hard as I can that this means that I'm dealing with a more transitory problem than a torn meniscus - if there's any way I can get out of this situation without surgery, I'll be unendingly grateful - and that going back to work tomorrow won't undo all the good that this sedentary weekend has done.
I've managed to avoid falling into a completely horrible mood, also, thanks to the presence of good friends, Top Chef marathons, an impressive stack of crafting projects, and the new issue of 'Fine Cooking: Cookies' - it's not *quite* too early to start planning this season's holiday baking. I'm bored and achy, but neither homicidal nor suicidal. And that's something, I guess.
I had it brought home to me today, by a friend who called to find out why I had apparently vanished off the face of the earth a month ago, just how much crap I've been through lately. Car accidents, serious work problems, overbooking, performance (fun, but still stressy), financial woes, travel, injury, pushing my own emotional boundaries... and I'm tired, and frustrated, but I'm still here.
I know I've been less than present lately, and I've probably been less than pleasant, as well. At the same time, though, I'm a tiny bit proud of myself for not falling apart utterly. So - apologies and gratitude beyond belief to all of y'all that I've been leaning on, and a plea for just a little more patience. With any luck the universe will get tired of kicking me around sometime soon, and I can eventually spring back to being a little ray of sunshine again.....
