Hurry Up And Relax!!!

[ladysprite]

Whatever happened to my low-key, light-scheduled, easy summer of relaxation? My whole goal for this summer was to go easy on my work schedule, keep myself as open as possible, and take time to have fun, relax, take care of myself, and see people. And yet somehow I have wound up just as hectic as always, just as busy, and still somehow feeling like I'm running behind, lost, and frazzled. And it's doubly frustrating, because I feel almost like someone is standing behind me, shouting that I'm supposed to hurry up and enjoy myself, and force as much fun and relaxation into every minute of my time as possible - which is about as counterproductive as humanly possible.

And now that summer is truly, well and gloriously here, I *want* my freedom. I know that for other people it's too hot, too bright, and too strong, but for me days like today are like food and water for my soul. I step outside and feel the sun on my skin and hair and the warmth pouring into my body like some kind of embrace from the sky, and I feel like I can breathe again. My shoulders drop from my ears back to where they belong, and all my muscles loosen up and I can't help but smile, and maybe believe that the problems I face might just be solvable.

Unfortunately, this also means that the last thing I want to do is go back into work, or face another week of doing just that. I want to go for long, long walks - to Harvard Square, in the Fells, through the Public Gardens, anywhere. I want to eat ice cream. I want to flop on the grass and read a good book, I want to dance, I want to wear sundresses and be barefoot and feel the earth under my feet. I want salad-for-dinner, and staying up late, and watching cheesy movies just for the air conditioning.

I want my summer, and I want it now. I'm tired of being a grownup, right now....

Comments

[ladysprite.livejournal.com]

I tend to book in stages. For any given month, I'll have it about half-booked a few months in advance, another 1/4 about a month in advance, and then add a few dates at the last minute. If I know in advance that I need to have a week or a weekend off i can just not book it; the challenge is either overbooking from fear of not getting enough work, or just being a softie and not being able to say no to favorite doctors or clinics....

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Ah... so you probably aren't completely hosed for, say, late July, but next week isn't going to change much at this point. Hrm. Waiting until late July for fun 'n' sun is still a bit grumpymaking. :-/ I wish you luck and a lot of coincidental perfect weather on your days off. :-)