Pet Peeve

[ladysprite]

I know this as a really small, petty thing to get irked over, but it's been on my mind for some time now, and it just keeps grating on my nerves more and more.

I really, REALLY wish people would stop using the phrase 'so close I can taste it.' It just makes absolutely no sense. If you're going to taste something, you don't need to be *close* to it, you need to be actually sharing intimate space with it. I can understand wanting something more visceral than 'so close I can see it,' but... taste? Really? That's rather beyond close.

Also, it leads to some truly unpleasant theoretical sensations for those of us with vivid and overactive imaginations. For instance - "I'm so close to that prize money I can taste it?"

Ick. I mean, I admit I don't actually know what money tastes like; for all I know it could be delicious greenback candy. But I'm willing to speculate that it tastes like sweaty stale paper that's been marinating in leather in someone's back pocket for a year. Not a good thing, and not something I would want to get any closer to if I had even the vaguest say in the matter. Ditto for '....so close to the top X [of competitors]' and '...so close to the next round of [competition].'

Though I must admit it has at least led me to speculate on what victory actually tastes like. I can't quite make up my mind whether it's more like deep-fried macaroni and cheese, or a raspberry lime rickey. Opinions?

Comments

[z-gryphon.livejournal.com]

Well, evidently napalm in the morning smells like victory, so given that, I suspect it probably doesn't taste very good.

[pujaemuss.livejournal.com]

You beat me to that reference! I was going to say that victory must taste like burning.

PJW

[darkoni]

Victory tastes like chocolate chip ice cream ... and on some days like sweat and artificial fruit flavoring.

[cristovau.livejournal.com]

Victory tastes salty because of all the sweat.

And I generally prefer close enough that I can sweat on it. Might be the weather.

[mindways]

I'm so close to that prize money I can taste it

Blech. :P

The phrase can make sense for anything with a very strong scent, though like the money, it may conjure unpleasant imagery. You can smell a skunk from a good ways away; much closer, the scent starts triggering taste, and "so close you can taste it" makes an unfortunate amount of sense.

(Perhaps something floral or food-like would have made a better example. :-P)

Victory is supposed to be sweet, so I'd expect it to taste sweet, though there's also the napalm reference mentioned above. Perhaps it would taste like sweet burning? Or sweet napalm, but that lets out the possibility of making some sort of baked good with loads of honey and hot-pepper and calling it Victory.

[deguspice.livejournal.com]

If they're close enough to taste it, it's a problem they can lick?

[evcelt.livejournal.com]

"So close I can taste it" only makes sense from the POV of a dog. I can totally understand it from Mungo-dog's POV. ;-)

As far as the taste of victory... I think that depends on the person. For me, it varies... Macallan Cask Strength occurs to me, because that's what beat larpwriting in the second round of single-malt vs. blends. ;-)

[gmkieran.livejournal.com]

what's a "rickey"? I like raspberry-lime as a combo, but I've never associated it with victory in any sense. Victory *should* be sweet, but I'm allergic to sweet these days (damn you, daibetes!) so...victory, for me, probably tastes like exhaust fumes and petrol (I know, not appealing, but I *like* re-building motorcycles), but only in certain situations. To each their own! :D

[umbran.livejournal.com]

A rickey is a relative of a highball - some base spirit, half a lime (squeezed and dropped into the glass), and carbonated water.

The typical raspberry-lime rickey replaces the spirit with raspberry syrup.

[laurion]

Huh. I always knew the expression as 'So close I can -almost- taste it'. Which makes sense. So, yeah, anyone leaving out the key word is definitely getting it wrong.