Money Matters

[ladysprite]

Apologies for the rant that's about to follow, but....

So I've been thinking a lot recently about social classes, and financial privilege. And I have to wonder - at what point of material well-being does one become incapable of comprehending that there are people whose upbringing did not match theirs?

Because I have a significant handful of friends - good friends, good people - who grew up fairly well-off, who are just incapable of comprehending this. They weren't wealthy, and that's all that they see, and so they feel that they grew up underprivileged. And, by extrapolation, that anyone else who claims the label 'underprivileged' grew up in a situation like theirs.

And to be honest, it frustrates me, because... well, there was a bit more challenge to growing up on food stamps, or with sometimes not enough money for both heat and food, than to growing up with only one summer home and no in-ground pool.

I grew up lower-middle class. Food stamps, reduced-price school lunches, hand-me-down clothes from my cousin who was sixteen years older than me. And yet I understand that it could have been a hell of a lot worse, and that there were people out there who DID have it a lot worse - we had enough food (mostly cheap stuff like Hamburger Helper, but it was food), we had a phone and tv.

And I think that's what confuses me the most. It seems like, at some level of privilege, people become incapable of recognizing that some people have it worse. And I don't understand how this happens, or at what point - or when the assumption becomes that everyone starts life off with more or less the same resources as you.

(And on that note, don't get me started on 'We're not rich, we WORKED for our money!' So did my family. The only difference is we started out with a lot more debt and a lot fewer resources, and earned a lot less. We weren't poor because we were lazy; we were poor because no one paid for our education or sent us out into the world with a stock portfolio and a trust fund.)

That said... ultimately what I want is to understand, and figure out how to explain. Because it's no one's fault that they grew up in different circumstances, and ultimately, as I said, they're good people. But I think that finding a way to communicate clearly this difference in experiences and circumstances would go a long way to improving the situation in this country.....

Comments

[rosinavs.livejournal.com]

Interestingly, and falsely I now know, my parents gave me the strong impression that tradesmen and the working class could never climb above lower middle class unless they transitioned to management which was then a white collar position. Not explicitly taught, of course, but very close to it. My father still believes that steelworkers are not middle class. By virtue of being steelworkers, regardless of savings, or homeownership status. It confuses me.

I find this somewhat fascinating. My grandfather was a steelworker. He and my grandmother scrimped and saved to buy the 4-plex they were renting in from her father, and they were probably at best lower middle class.

Of course, that was at a time when it was much easier to own a house than it is today. Salaries were much closer to house prices. I probably couldn't find a house at the same house/salary ratio anywhere within 100 miles of where I currently work. Oddly, even though I also own a house and am probably solidly middle-middle class, I'm not really any better off in terms of debt due to that ratio.

[etherial.livejournal.com]

Didn't your grandfather want to send his sons to college so they could become skilled laborers in the steel mill? That's totally "can't see how to make it out of lower class" thinking.

[rosinavs.livejournal.com]

He didn't want to send them to college, he wanted to send them to a vocational technical high school to learn a trade. Then they would be able to be hired at skilled worker rates in the steel mills, and also be less likely to be laid off. Going to college was my father's idea, and he had to pay to go to the college prep public high school by working at his grandfather's grocery store.