Not Absent, Just Resting
Mar. 12th, 2016 09:15 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladyspriteSome habits are harder to form and keep than others. Especially when those habits take time and energy, and you're incredibly depleted on both.
I spent last weekend in PA at a fairly awesome Deadlands-themed LARP, where I realized that most of my late-1800's themed costuming matches my current cotton-candy hair far better than anticipated, spent much-needed time reconnecting with old friends I haven't seen in far too long, and got to play out an amazingly dramatic and angst-filled romance plot. And I'm grateful beyond words that in my current fatigued state, I can still fill my extroverted heart and soul to overflowing by curling up half-asleep in the lap of a friend while people around me laugh and talk and generally surround me with joy and noise and happiness.
And then home, to work. And work, and work, and work. I'm filling in at a clinic that's chronically overbooked and under-staffed, so I'm generally lucky if I get out less than an hour before closing, and every work day this week has been followed by a late-night house call after work hours. And I love what I do, but that's draining as hell. And I know I could say no, but... I don't want to. Because I'm still growing my business, because I feel like what I do is important, because it feels good to be needed, because a lot of things.
Meanwhile, it turns out my doc put me on the wrong dose of supplement, so no wonder that's not working. Taking 2000 IU of Vitamin D when you're supposed to be taking 50,000 is kind of significant. So hoping that fixing that will help. And if it doesn't, I get to put my foot down and demand a referral to an endocrinologist.
Right now, though, it's the weekend and I don't have any house calls booked (at the moment) and I'm looking forward to at least one day of nothing more strenuous than going to a movie and maybe out to lunch...
I spent last weekend in PA at a fairly awesome Deadlands-themed LARP, where I realized that most of my late-1800's themed costuming matches my current cotton-candy hair far better than anticipated, spent much-needed time reconnecting with old friends I haven't seen in far too long, and got to play out an amazingly dramatic and angst-filled romance plot. And I'm grateful beyond words that in my current fatigued state, I can still fill my extroverted heart and soul to overflowing by curling up half-asleep in the lap of a friend while people around me laugh and talk and generally surround me with joy and noise and happiness.
And then home, to work. And work, and work, and work. I'm filling in at a clinic that's chronically overbooked and under-staffed, so I'm generally lucky if I get out less than an hour before closing, and every work day this week has been followed by a late-night house call after work hours. And I love what I do, but that's draining as hell. And I know I could say no, but... I don't want to. Because I'm still growing my business, because I feel like what I do is important, because it feels good to be needed, because a lot of things.
Meanwhile, it turns out my doc put me on the wrong dose of supplement, so no wonder that's not working. Taking 2000 IU of Vitamin D when you're supposed to be taking 50,000 is kind of significant. So hoping that fixing that will help. And if it doesn't, I get to put my foot down and demand a referral to an endocrinologist.
Right now, though, it's the weekend and I don't have any house calls booked (at the moment) and I'm looking forward to at least one day of nothing more strenuous than going to a movie and maybe out to lunch...
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Date: 2016-03-12 03:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-03-13 01:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-03-14 04:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-03-16 04:45 am (UTC)I hope you're fit and fixed soon! I know better than most how bad fatigue is.