Rules of Veterinary Cosmic Consciousness
May. 11th, 2002 06:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ladysprite1) There is no such thing as a free pet.
2) Never name your pet 'Lucky.'
Animals named Lucky just have a giant cosmic Kick Me sign hung around their necks. I think the universe views it as a personal challenge. Witness the most recent Lucky I treated, who started life as a stray, and in less than 12 hours was first run over by the people trying to adopt her, then poisoned by them when they decided to give her Tylenol instead of the aspirin I prescribed.
For those of you playing along in the audience, Tylenol kills cats. No exceptions. There is no safe dose, just the toxic dose and the more-toxic dose. This kitten survived due to immediate treatment, only to be taken out of the hospital early because the family decided they didn't want to pay for continued care. Yep, she's real Lucky.
Their defense was that they figured aspirin and tylenol were more or less the same thing, and that I didn't tell them *not* to give Tylenol. I didn't tell them not to give the kitten a whirly-fun ride on the blades of their food processor either, but I'll bet they figured that one out..... I decided to not tell them not to go screw themselves sideways.
How much do I need to spell out for people? Every time I decide to err on the side of figuring that they couldn't have survived to adulthood without learning a few basic concepts, fate conspires to prove me wrong. I assume that people will know that aspirin and tylenol are not the same thing. I assume that if something has 'DO NOT USE ON CATS' written on it in screaming red letters in three places, they won't use it on their cat. I assume that people will realize that if a raccoon is walking towards them down the middle of their street in broad daylight, that does not mean that it's tame and friendly, and that petting it is a bad idea. I assume that people will realize that if a baby bunny has been completely skinned by their cat, there's not much we can do to save it. I assume that if I tell people that some particular medication is vital to their pet's survival, they will believe me and give it.
And when I don't assume these things, and spell them out, people are offended because they think I'm treating them like imbeciles. There must be a happy medium in here somewhere.
2) Never name your pet 'Lucky.'
Animals named Lucky just have a giant cosmic Kick Me sign hung around their necks. I think the universe views it as a personal challenge. Witness the most recent Lucky I treated, who started life as a stray, and in less than 12 hours was first run over by the people trying to adopt her, then poisoned by them when they decided to give her Tylenol instead of the aspirin I prescribed.
For those of you playing along in the audience, Tylenol kills cats. No exceptions. There is no safe dose, just the toxic dose and the more-toxic dose. This kitten survived due to immediate treatment, only to be taken out of the hospital early because the family decided they didn't want to pay for continued care. Yep, she's real Lucky.
Their defense was that they figured aspirin and tylenol were more or less the same thing, and that I didn't tell them *not* to give Tylenol. I didn't tell them not to give the kitten a whirly-fun ride on the blades of their food processor either, but I'll bet they figured that one out..... I decided to not tell them not to go screw themselves sideways.
How much do I need to spell out for people? Every time I decide to err on the side of figuring that they couldn't have survived to adulthood without learning a few basic concepts, fate conspires to prove me wrong. I assume that people will know that aspirin and tylenol are not the same thing. I assume that if something has 'DO NOT USE ON CATS' written on it in screaming red letters in three places, they won't use it on their cat. I assume that people will realize that if a raccoon is walking towards them down the middle of their street in broad daylight, that does not mean that it's tame and friendly, and that petting it is a bad idea. I assume that people will realize that if a baby bunny has been completely skinned by their cat, there's not much we can do to save it. I assume that if I tell people that some particular medication is vital to their pet's survival, they will believe me and give it.
And when I don't assume these things, and spell them out, people are offended because they think I'm treating them like imbeciles. There must be a happy medium in here somewhere.
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::sigh::
Don't even go there. I see at least 3 or 4 cats a year where the owner has decided there's a flea problem, and they need to do something about it right now. So they go and grab the first product they find at the local bargain basement (feed store/grocery store/etc), and put a dose on the cat (or two, 'cause, hey, if one's good, two must be better!). Then I get to save the cat a day or two later after the poor cat has been seizuring for many hours, because what they put on the cat was a dog product. Says right on the label, DO NOT USE ON CATS!. "But it doesn't say it can kill them!?!". Even has an 800 number for emergencies right on the package, but no one ever seems to use it ...
I have lost all but one of those cats.
There's a reason the prescription labels from my office say "give every 12 hours" instead of "give twice daily" ("gee, if I give it now, and give it again in an hour, I'm done for the day!")
There's a reason why the ear medication label says "Apply immediately after cleaning the ear", since I had one owner who faithfully cleaned the ears for the first week, then was planning to use the medicine for the next week.
I hate labeling and instructions for the lowest common denominator, but if I don't do it that way, s*** happens, ya' know?
It helps to remember the good ones as much as you can :-)
Re: ::sigh::
Date: 2002-05-11 06:56 am (UTC)Yesterday, I was giving out graduation gowns. I told all of them, "Of course you know this, but I have to tell you anyway -- whatever shows beneath the gown has to be formal. And really the rest of it should be too." They were willing to accept it because I put the "of course you know this" at the beginning. Maybe it would work with veterinary customers as well.
no subject
Date: 2002-05-11 06:33 am (UTC)As ever, I applaud and admire you for fighting the good fight. Go you. :)
A.
no subject
Date: 2002-05-11 07:27 am (UTC)It probably would be a good idea to tell people to give the cat "aspirin... it has to be regular aspirin, because other pain killers either don't work, or are poisonous to cats", because they are used to being told "take (name of pain reliever)" by their doctor, and being able to assume they can substitute any pain reliever of their choice.
Damnedest thing is, doctors probably have a similar problem fairly frequently. (I can half-imagine "Well, doctor, you told me not to take Tylenol because of my liver problems, but I've always gotten by better with a few shots of whiskey, anyway....")